Are You Faithful or Deceitful?

Reading this article tonight and thought of the message we shared during the opening session of the R.M.S. gathering on the topic of Covenant Friendship.
This is awesome! The last paragraph is especially powerful.

May the Exalted Christ grace each of us to be "faithful rather than deceitful" friends. The writer in Proverbs 27:6 certainly reveals the stark contrast.

[rgh]


Faithful are the wounds of a friend...deceitful are the kisses of an enemy

"A simple reading of this verse reveals that true friendship is not void of confrontation. Too many people assume that if confrontation or disagreement enter a relationship, that relationship cannot be or remain a true friendship. This view of friendship is based on the expectation that a beneficial relationship is never supposed to have difficult moments, or a beneficial relationship is one in which both parties do as they please and never interfere in one another’s lives. But the Bible teaches just the opposite. In fact, as this verse implies, a truly beneficial relationship is one in which one party “wounds” the other.

Solomon says: “faithful are the wounds of a friend.” Right away, we see that a friend, a true friend, will sometimes “wound” you. We have to ask: What kind of wounds is Solomon referring to?”

These “wounds” are of a particular kind. Solomon calls them “faithful.” This word (aman) means such things as “that which gives support, that which upholds, that which nourishes.” This term is used in a literal manner to describe the pillars of a building; figuratively, it refers to what is reliable or trustworthy.

The word translated “wound” (petsa) means just that, a wounding or a bruising caused by a blow. Solomon is speaking of words spoken by one to another which, while emotionally painful and perhaps hard to endure, are, in the end, of significant benefit. They are words or challenges spoken by one to another that are designed to reveal faults, but not for the simple purpose of condemnation; they are words or challenges spoken by one to another for the purpose of edification.

Here is the fundamental distinction between the Bible’s view of friendship and the world’s view of friendship: A true friend is the one who will speak to you about your sin—not to embarrass you or make himself look better by comparison, but in order to make you a better person and a person living a more honorable life before God.

We should note that the teaching of Solomon has two sides to it. There is the side of the one giving the rebuke and the side of the one receiving the rebuke. A true friend will give the rebuke and a true friend will receive the rebuke. Humility, therefore, is mandatory for both parties.

Contrasted to this kind of beneficial relationship, Solomon presents what amounts to a false friendship: “but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy.”

A true friend wounds for our benefit, but the one who kisses us, as it were, or speaks flattery or seems to find nothing to criticize in us is, in reality, an enemy. An enemy, not a friend, praises us when he should rebuke us; an enemy, not a friend, ignores our faults when he should identify them."

http://bordwine.org/?p=203